Children should be seen. And heard. And consulted.
Once the outdoors were unsafe for children to play, to rest, to experiment and learn. We had cars laced into every element of our outdoor spaces, a culture of surveillance that chased teenagers indoors, and no social support network for parents and caregivers. Yelling at children to get off the lawn became a way of life. Loneliness and post-partum skyrocketed as children disappeared from view, the support was gone.
You cannot destroy the nests then ask why there are no eggs.
But we changed that. We created porous communities with a system of once forgotten kinfolk. Guncles and Aunties, Godparents and Neighbors and Good Adults once again took an interest in the lives of children and teenagers, bridging inter-generational friendships. Villages were knitted together as our youth were no longer policed by officers, but protected by kith and kin.
It started by creating a physical space to interact. Parking lots were deconstructed and replaced with playgrounds, sensory gardens, treehouses, art centers, cookouts, food pantries, mud pits and outdoor stages. Teenagers were considered in the planning, we carved out safe places for them to exercise, to build friendships, and form social bonds. Bikes replaced cars as a means of transportation, allowing personal connections to flow again.
We changed from an individualism-at-any-cost to a community-care mentality. Children and teenagers grew up with a web of loving adults dedicated to their wellbeing, attending school plays and sport games. Kids could be tossed outside for hours a day without direct supervision, the community provided plenty of safe space and guidance. Meal-trains ran around the clock for caregivers who needed it, homemade meals delivered on teenage wheels. The isolated and the elderly were no longer lonely as a village of honorary grandchildren were involved back in their lives too.
Welcome to the future. Can you come out to play?